Something witty and clever

dutchster:

*1 second after sex*
*mom comes running in*
alright you two lovebirds up up up time to get these sheets in the wash

krook:

innocent looking girls that are secretly kinky as fuck are girls worth living for

oneknottyguy:

http://ift.tt/PvqgBc
Cashier: That'll be $4.03
Me: I only have $4...
Cashier: That's ok, I have the three cents
Me: ...........
Cashier: ........
Me: what are we?

negative5potato:

Hella all the way

completely-dunn:

wifipassworcl:

thepottertardis:

apertures413thdoctor:

pleatedjeans:

via

Ellen what the fuck happened in 1998

ellen degeneres came out in 1997

yeah but ellen what happened in 2014

ellen page came out in 2014

completely-dunn:

wifipassworcl:

thepottertardis:

apertures413thdoctor:

pleatedjeans:

via

Ellen what the fuck happened in 1998

ellen degeneres came out in 1997

yeah but ellen what happened in 2014

ellen page came out in 2014

ibakedyouacake:

*me pointing to a character* chubby

*fandom large crying voice* no… you don’t understand… they cant be chubby………. Stop….. theyre supposed to be hot…….. you’re wrong…… you cannot say this fake thing….

*me pointing to a character* luv this chubby character

40ozhoe:

cheefkief:

40ozhoe:

me cause football right around the corner 

Wow. Tumblr is supposed to be a sanctuary, a safe haven, even, for alternative lifestyles. Not for high school jocks interested in the most common thing ever. Seriously, football is exactly the kind of thing someone joins tumblr to escape from. Stop watching football and go join a fandom, or delete your account.

Signed, a proud football-hating SuperWhoLockianStuckSwimmingOnTitanPotter fan.

NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

we takin’ over